Nick: Daddy
Me: Yes.
Nick: Can I climb on this wall?
Me: No.
Nick: Why?
Me: Because it’s dangerous and you’ll fall down.
Nick: Daddy?
Me: Yes.
Nick: My tummy is hungry.
Me: After mommy is done signing the papers, we’ll get lunch.
Nick: No! I don’t want to wait and get lunch! I want to eat something now!
Me: Not right now. In a few minutes. We’ll have the new car and we can drive it home then get some lunch. Won’t that be cool?
Nick: No! I want something from the vending machine!
Me: You already had a bag of crackers.
Nick: No! I want something else!
Me: Nick, you can’t have anything else to eat right now.
Nick: Pleeeease! I’m hungry. I’m hungry, daddy. Please can I have something to eat? I’m hungry. I want something to eat. I’m hungry. Can I please have something to eat daddy? Please? I want something. Please? Daddy, can I have something to eat? I’m hungry. Daddy. Daddy. Daddy. I want something. I want something to eat. Please could I have something to eat? Please? Daddy I want something to eat. Please can I? I want to, dad. I want something. I’m hungry. Please can I have something. I want something to eat. Please, daddy? I’m hungry.
Me: Oh, my God. Don’t say “I’m hungry” one more time. Don’t do it.
Nick: I’m thirsty.
Me: You just had a bottle of water.
Nick: Please, dad can I have something?
Me: No.
Nick: OKAY! I’M JUST GOING TO EAT MY FINGER! I’M EATING MY FINGER! MMMMM! MY FINGER IS TASTY, DADDY! I ATE IT ALREADY! NOW I GONNA EAT MY OTHER FINGERS! MMMMM! I EATING ALL MY FINGERS! THEY ARE THE MOST DELICIOUS THING I EVER TASTED! TASTE THEM, DADDY! TASTE MY FINGERS!
Me: I DON’T WANT TO TASTE YOUR FINGERS! STOP IT! STOP IT!
Nick: Okay. Daddy?
Me: Yes.
Nick: Can I climb on this wall?
David Lee White 