CONVERSATIONS WITH NICK ABOUT SOAP PIE

nick panera

ME: What do you want for breakfast, bud?

NICK: Soap pie.

ME: What?

NICK: Soap pie. With dinosaur meat.

ME: Soap pie with dinosaur meat?

NICK: Why do you always repeat what I say??? *sigh*

ME: How do you make soap pie with dinosaur meat?

NICK: First, you have to cook the bacon.

ME: How do you do that?

NICK: First, you swallow the bacon, then you pour hot water in your mouth so that it goes into your pipes and cooks the bacon.

ME: Okay. How do you get the bacon out of your stomach?

NICK: You spit it out into the the TV.

ME: Right. So you swallow bacon, then pour hot water down your throat to cook the bacon, then spit the cooked bacon out INTO the television.

NICK: YES!

ME: But…wait… where does the soap come in? And the dinosaur meat?

NICK: DAD! DO I HAVE TO FIGURE OUT EVERYTHING!!!!

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