CONVERSATIONS WITH NICK ABOUT TRAFFIC VIOLATIONS

2014-08-03 16.30.01

CONTEXT ALERT – Nick’s grandpa Vin appears in this conversation. Nick calls him “Grumps.”

NICK: Grumps?

VIN: Yes?

NICK: Tell me about your speeding ticket.

VIN: My speeding ticket. Okay, well about ten years ago I got a speeding ticket. And I went to court to pay the fine. That’s really all there is to the story.

ALLISON: I remember that. Grumps was mad.

NICK: Is this before I was born?

VIN: Yes. This was ten years ago.

ME: I’ve only ever gotten one speeding ticket. When I was 21.

NICK: Before I was born?

ME: Yes. But I’ve never gotten one since.

ALLISON: That’s not true. You got one downtown a few years ago.

ME: Yeah, but they reduced it to a seat belt ticket just as a warning. So it doesn’t count.

NICK: THIS ONE TIME, YOU KNOW WHAT? BILLY AND BILLY 2 WERE SPEEDING AND YOU KNOW WHAT? THEY HIT A CAR AND THEN THAT CAR HIT A CAR AND THEN THEY KNOCKED A BUILDING DOWN. AND THEN THAT BUILDING FELL AND KNOCKED ANOTHER BUILDING DOWN AND THEN ANOTHER AND ANOTHER. AND THEN THE POLICE CAME AND THEY SAID “YOU BAD GUYS GO TO JAIL!” AND THEN BILLY AND BILLY RAN AWAY FROM THE POLICE! BUT THE POLICE GOT IN THEIR CAR AND THEY CHASED THEM AND SAID “STOP RUNNING AWAY YOU BAD GUYS!” AND SO THEN THEY ARRESTED THEM AND PUT THEM IN JAIL BUT THEY GOT OUT OF JAIL AND FLEW OUT THE WINDOW AND LANDED IN THE GARBAGE AND KNOW WHAT? THEY GOT RECYCLED!

ME: Okay, Nick wins.

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